After finishing school in England, I knew I wasn’t ready to go straight to university. I wanted to travel, experience something completely different and make my gap year feel worthwhile. Becoming an au pair in Germany gave me the chance to do that — although the experience hasn’t always been easy.
When I finished school, I was craving something new and exciting. I wanted to see more of the world before going to university, but I also needed something that wouldn’t require me to spend a huge amount of money.
Au pairing felt like a good middle ground. I could live in another country, learn a language, experience everyday life there and still have opportunities to travel.
Germany has also been a great base for seeing more of Europe. I’ve travelled to the Netherlands, for example, and having so many neighbouring countries makes spontaneous trips much easier.
My mornings are usually quite relaxed, and I like to get any housework done early so I can enjoy some time to myself afterwards.
The afternoons are normally busier, with kindergarten pick-ups and the children’s activities. One thing I’ve definitely learned is to expect the unexpected — plans with children can change quickly.
Finding things we both enjoy, like baking, games, crafts or going for bike rides, has also made looking after the children easier and more fun.
I think one of the biggest things I underestimated was how difficult it can be to settle into a completely new environment.
At the beginning, I didn’t know anyone apart from my host family. It was especially hard seeing my friends back home together, and making new friends while dealing with a language barrier wasn’t always easy.
Everything feels different at first — the language, food, customs and everyday routines. I’d say it took me more than four months to feel properly comfortable.
That’s something I think future au pairs should know: you don’t have to feel settled straight away.
When I first arrived, I quickly realised I could have prepared a little better. These are the things that would have helped me most.
Pocket money covers everyday expenses, but having some savings gives you more freedom if you want to travel or do activities.
The first few weeks can feel lonely. I wish I had used apps and social media earlier to meet other au pairs and people nearby.
Look into hobbies, gyms or activities close to your host family. Having something of your own outside au pairing makes a big difference.
Learn a few basics of the language, speak clearly with your host family about your responsibilities and, if possible, talk to their previous au pair. The more you know beforehand, the fewer surprises there are.
Some of the cultural differences have been surprisingly small — but you notice them when you’re living here every day.
Germany has a lot of bread. I wasn’t expecting Abendbrot, which is basically an evening meal centred around bread.
Then there are Sundays. Most shops are closed, which was frustrating at first because weekends are when I have the most free time.
People also take recycling very seriously. Separating rubbish is normal, and I actually really like the Pfand system, where you return bottles and cans to the supermarket and get money back.
Those little differences are part of what makes living somewhere else interesting. You slowly stop comparing everything to home and start understanding why people do things differently.
For me, definitely.
There have been moments when I’ve missed home, felt lonely or wondered why adjusting was taking me so long. But I’ve also met people from around the world, improved my German, travelled and learned far more about myself than I expected.
Moving abroad by yourself can sound really daunting when you’re standing at the beginning of it. You don’t know the language properly, you don’t know the culture and you’re leaving your friends and family behind.
But you don’t have to feel at home immediately.
Give yourself time to find your people, settle into the family and create a life that also feels like your own. Looking back on my gap year, I can say one thing for sure is: I do not regret becoming an au pair
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