Making friends as an au pair can help you feel at home, discover your host country and enjoy your experience more. Some of the easiest ways to meet people are to connect with other au pairs online, join local communities and take part in regular activities.
Building a social circle may take time, especially when you have just arrived, but these tips can help you meet other au pairs, international people and locals.
Other au pairs understand what it is like to live with a host family and settle into a new country. This shared experience can make it easier to connect and build friendships.
Search on Instagram, TikTok and Facebook using terms such as:
Many cities also have Facebook or WhatsApp groups where au pairs organise coffee dates, day trips and other meet-ups. Check that a group appears active and trustworthy before sharing personal information.
You can also use our Instagram post about making friends while living abroad. Comment with your location and how long you will be there to connect with other au pairs nearby.
Friendship and community apps can help you find people nearby who share your interests.
Depending on your host country, you could try:
You do not need to use every app. Choose one or two that are popular in your area and look for activities you would genuinely enjoy.
When meeting someone from an app or social media group for the first time:
Take your time getting to know people and trust your instincts.
Language courses are a great place to meet other au pairs, international students and newcomers. You already have a shared goal and will see the same people regularly, which makes it easier to build friendships naturally.
You can also look for language exchanges, conversation clubs, university language programmes or events for social meetups like Mundo Lingo and The Social Melting Pot (Germany). After class, ask someone whether they would like to get a coffee or practise together.
Your host family may know other families with au pairs nearby. Ask whether they can introduce you or recommend local clubs, events and activities. You may also meet other au pairs through your host children’s school, nursery or hobbies.
Shared activities make it easier to start conversations and meet people with similar interests.
Look for:
Finding regular activities is especially helpful because you meet the same people more than once, you get to know them gradually and it gives friendships time to develop.
You do not always need a special event to meet new people. Visiting the same café, park, library or gym regularly can help you recognise familiar faces and start conversations. These connections do not have to become close friendships. Even small interactions can help you feel more connected to your local community and more involved in everyday life in your host country, rather than simply feeling like a visitor.
A simple question can be enough:
Making friends in a new country does not always happen immediately. Some people may become close friends, while others may simply make everyday life feel more familiar and welcoming. Stay open, take small steps and keep showing up. Over time, these connections can help you build a social circle, feel part of your local community and make your au pair experience even more meaningful.
