How to use the messaging system

Safe, personal and direct – the messaging system enables you to quickly find your au pair/host family.

Data protection 

The messaging system enables you to contact other users within the protected environment of AuPairWorld. Your contact information is never passed on to third parties. Naturally, you are free to give your own telephone number, Skype or email address to au pairs/host families. However, you decide when and with whom you exchange your details.

Messaging each other

Standard messages

Thanks to our standard messages, au pairs and host families can show their mutual interest in each other – regardless of whether one of them is a Premium Member or not.

Personal Messages

As Premium Members, host families can both send personal messages to au pairs and read personal messages written by au pairs. The same applies if au pairs, not host families, are Premium Members.

Au pairs can always write personal messages, no matter if they are Premium Members or not. However, these messages can only be read by a host family if either the au pair or the family is a Premium Member.

Usually, host families become Premium Members to enable both parties to exchange personal messages.


All messages which are exchanged between an au pair and a host family form a conversation.

Premium Conversations

If a user sends a message and one of the parties is a Premium Member, the conversation becomes a Premium Conversation for both conversational partners. In other words, au pairs and host families can start exchanging personal messages.

Premium Conversations can be continued by both conversational partners, even after a Premium Membership has expired.


The application is the first message in a conversation. Both au pairs and host families can start a conversation by sending an application. Please note that you are only allowed to send a limited number of applications.

If you receive an application, you can either answer positively (and continue the conversation) or negatively (and end the conversation). There are standard texts for both of these responses.

Read and Unread messages

You can easily see whether a message has been read or not: If the envelope is turquoise, the message hasn't been read yet. If the envelope is grey, the message has been read.

Mailbox and Archive

You can find all ongoing conversations in your mailbox. In Archive you can find finished conversations.The conversation is marked as finished as soon as you either recieve or send a rejection. Finished conversations are then moved into Archive as soon as they have been read.

Frequently Asked Questions concerning the messaging system

I have received an email notification about a new message in my Received folder on AuPairWorld. However, when I log into my profile, I cannot find the new message. What is the reason for this?

It is not because of a technical fault that you are unable to find this new, unread message in your Received folder, but because...

  • a) You have already read the corresponding messages.

Our system regularly checks whether you have received new messages, and notifies you by email. However, because the system ignores whether or not you have logged into your profile in the meantime, sometimes you are notified of new messages after you have already read them on AuPairWorld.

  • or b) Your conversational partner has deactivated his or her profile in the meantime.

A user may have sent you a message and then deactivated his or her account before you log into your profile again. If this is the case, you may be sent an email notification but the respective conversation is deleted from your Received folder as soon as the user's account is deactivated.

Should I write my messages or applications to French au pairs / families in English or French?
All my standard messages appear in English, but every time I write my personal message in French your system underlines it in red. 

Standard messages (applications) are always displayed in the language of your computer's browser. After your message has been sent and received, it is displayed in the default language of the receiver's browser. (Thus, your standard message is automatically translated). So, in your case, our system has automatically displayed the standard text in English according to your browser and the French au pair / family would read the same text in French (provided French is the language of their browser). However, personal texts that you wish to attach to standard messages are not translated by our system. Therefore, for these personal texts, and any other subsequent personal texts you send, you can choose the language in which you prefer to communicate.


Log in to AuPairWorld

Not yet registered?
Registration is quick and free

Register as an au pair
Register as a host family
Already have an account?
Click here to login